He Knows Us Better

In church on Sunday, one of the speakers said "Heavenly Father knows us better than we even know ourselves". Thinking about that comment made me realize how true that is. I think I know myself pretty well, but Heavenly Father knows me even better. He knows how far I can stretch. He knows exactly what will help me to learn and grow the most. He is all knowing, he knows how to make me a better person. A person worthy of all his gifts. He will never ask me to do something that he knows I cannot do. The key is trusting him enough to accept that fact. To accept that he will send us trails but that we handle them if we turn to him. I'm so grateful for an all knowing Father in Heaven who knows me better than I know myself.

What love is all about

To complete my theme on "How can I help", I have to talk about my husband. I have been blessed with the most supportive husband ever. He hasn't judged me once with all I have gone through. He hasn't complained when I'm having a hard time. When I'm talking nonsense, he still listens quietly and lets my say what I have to say. He has hidden notes for me reminding me how much he loves me. He has brought me home flowers and chocolates.

He was willing to call and scheduled an appointment with a counselor for me because he knew I wouldn't do it on my own. He went with me to that first appointment and helped me explain what was going on. Then when I was sent to a new doctor, he went with me again to help me explain better. He's given me priesthood blessings when I needed them most. He's been there when I've cried because it's just too hard. He's done laundry for me, cooked, cleaned, taken care of boys, done everything I needed him to do. He is a HUGE blessing in my life and I honestly don't know where I would be without him.

When he is away I miss him even more. There is an empty spot in my heart when he leaves for trips, but it's a good thing because it reminds me of how much he really does to help me and buoy me up. I love him with all my heart! He shows me every day what love is all about.

Supportive Family

Recently I sent an email out to my extended family, sharing with them what I have been struggling with. The love and support that I felt from them in their responses was priceless. I'm so grateful we have family to help us through our trials.  Family has helped me through this in so many ways. Here are just a few:

• Sent letters encouraging me to keep going
• Gave me a quote for my wall "Life doesn't have to be perfect to be wonderful"
• Sent texts asking how I was doing
• Sent texts that made me laugh (my brothers are especially great at that)
• Emails that came just when I've needed them, even if they were small and simple messages, some have been tender mercies from the Lord
• Responded to my long, hard to read through emails
• Tried to understand even though they haven't felt the same way before
• Understood because they've been through it too
• Read books to help them understand better what I was going through
• Given powerful priesthood blessings
• Called me to just say hi and see how I'm doing
• Called me because they knew I was having a bad day
• Told me I can call them anytime
• Reminded me over and over that they love me no matter what
• Dragged me (almost kicking and screaming) to a counselor
• Listened when I needed it most

All the little things my family has done help so much. I love them so much and am so blessed to have each one of them in my life.

True Friendship

The theme I've been focusing on, "How Can I Help" wouldn't be complete without mentioning a wonderful friendship that has come from this trial. We were already friends before, we had been swapping date night babysitting for a year. However, this trial has made our friendship even stronger.

I will never forget the day I shared with my friend that I was struggling with depression. She was so understanding about all I was going through. She didn't hesitate a moment to help me. She has been a true example to me of Christ-like love. There have been so many times she has come to my rescue. I've shared a lot with her of what goes through my mind and yet she still doesn't judge me and she  keeps on being my cheerleader through it all. "You got this" is my favorite catch phrase she says to cheer me along. I have sent her countless emails that she replies to with words of encouragement, reminders of the power of our Savior and the strength that comes from Him, and lots of great advice to help me out. She has knocked at my door multiple times to be my "distraction" for a little bit. I have so many memories of things she has done to help me that it would take multiple posts to cover them all. She has helped to lift this trial in my life so it's not so heavy.

I know she doesn't want to be in the spot light so I won't go on too much longer, but I have to share one of my most cherished memories. On one particular hard day, my husband was trying to decide whether he should go to work or not because of how I was that day. She called me that morning and I answered in tears. After some coordinating she decided to come over to my house. She arrived at my house shortly after with her makeup in her hands because she was not wanting to leave me alone for too long. We went to the library together. Then her wonderful husband watched the kids while we went to lunch, helped set things up for a Relief Society activity, and did some grocery shopping together. I will never forget that day and the true friend she was and still is today.

This post wouldn't be complete without a little shout out to her husband. That day she and I went and spent time together, not only did he watch the kids but he fed them lunch and even got my Kindergartner on the bus. He too has been a blessing through this trial. He's helped my husband give me blessings, he's watched kids while my friend and I went to lunch, he's helped in so many ways. I am so grateful for him.

To me this is what friendship is all about and I don't know what I do without this friend in my life. Thank you so much friend!!!

Unexpected Friendship

Friendship can come from all different avenues. I will forever be grateful for one friend who introduced me to a new friend. A friend who has helped me in so many ways, even though we live five hours apart and have only met each other once, and briefly at that. She has shared with me some very touching experiences she has had in her life. Experiences that shed a whole new light on the struggles I have been going through. She has listened to me and then given me advice to help me through. She is one amazing woman and I'm so grateful for her influence in my life. I'm so amazed at all she is able to accomplish and still have room to talk to me. I can't wait to get to know her a little better.

As I've thought more about the people who have stepped into my life recently and helped me so much, I've realized how truly blessed I am. The friendships I'm building are priceless. It's amazing to see how trials and service can bring us closer to each other.

So here is my challenge to you, next time you are given an opportunity to serve, even a friend of a friend, don't hesitate. You never know what friendships may come of your service.

Visiting Teachers

Two of the best visiting teachers have weaved their way into my life as a result of what I have been going through. I am so grateful for both of them. It was so hard for me to share with them how rough my life has been for the past while. Yet, from the moment I told them they have been a huge blessing. They have invited me to the park on my bad days. They have brought me little treats to let me know they're thinking about me. They have been so willing to watch my boys during visits with my counselor and doctor. To me they are exactly what a visiting teacher is all about. Even now, when they are no longer my visiting teachers (sniffle) I still feel their love. Thanks so much Kristin and Heidi!

How Can I Help?

One of the questions I receive a lot (my husband gets it too) is "How can I help?". I think we all ask this question a lot. That goes right along with the general comment you hear of "Let me know if you need anything". As I've thought about those two statements, I've realized people really do want to help but they don't know what they can do. So, here if a list of suggestions for all of you. If you know someone struggling with bipolar or depression, here are some things you can do to help:

• Pray. It sounds so simple and easy, but it helps.
• Follow the promptings you receive. Today in conference, President Monson said we should act on promptings immediately. Do not postpone any promptings you receive. I can't emphasize that enough. 
• Mail a letter or a card
• Don't be afraid to make a phone call
• Send an email saying you're thinking about them
• Text the person just to say hi
• One big secret, when I'm feeling down, I'm not going to call someone just to talk, it's too hard. So, saying, "let me know if I can help" just doesn't work cause I'm not going to ask for help. I'm pretty sure the same goes for lots of people in my situation.

I'm sure there are many more ways you can help, but when it really comes down to it, the best thing you can do is act on the promptings you receive. Heavenly Father knows the needs of all of us better than we know, he will guide us to ways to help those in need.

On another note, feel free to share my blog with others or even on Facebook. My goal with this blog is to help others who are dealing with bipolar disorder in their family and to hopefully add some spiritual views to what I have learned in this journey.